Naptime and Stats

The beginning of last week I started "Operation Naptime" because we have been having problems with solid naps since Day 1. I'd get her to take a 2 hr nap here and there, but that would be like once every week and a half. Other than that, I'd get these 30 minute cat naps here and there. I realized that most of it might have been due to being busy and out and about...which I know is my fault. Also it was due to me not recognizing her cues. So my neighbor let me borrow "The Baby Whisperer" book and I have been trying to employ most of the methods the past two weeks. Initially it was hard because I'd get her to nap almost an hour, but then she wouldn't go back down. Nighttime made me nervous at first because we used to feed her and put her straight to bed. The book suggests feeding her, then doing some type of activity, like a bath, and then putting to bed. Since we have been doing this we have had NO problems putting her to bed. Whoo hoo! Small victory!! Also since using the techniques we've been able to get on some sort of nap routine (not schedule, routine). Mama has also been doing a better job at recognizing when she is tired and putting her down. Go me! All in all, with doing this, she has been so a pleasant baby! Her witching hour has seemed to decrease and all is happy in the land :).

Avery had her two month appointment today. I have to say I was a bit nervous for her because I knew she'd be getting shots. It was so hard spending time with her in the office w/ her all cute in her diaper, smiling at me, knowing that she was about to get poked by some ginormous needles....and I'm not kidding, these needles were huge!! I was amazed at how great she did. She had 3 pokes and cried for about 2 minutes. She let me dress her, put her pacifier in, and within 5 minutes she was asleep. We're trying the first nap now so hopefully she gets the rest she needs. As far as stats here goes:
Weight- 11lbs 10oz
Height- 22.75 inches
Head- 40.5

Doctor said she looks great and she has no reasons to be concerned. There's a little greyish blue spot on her elbow that she's had since birth that she might like me to get checked out after the next appointment if there's any change.

2 months!

Man time is flying! Seems like just yesterday we brought little Avery home. Now it feels like she's a tank! How can such a little thing grow up so quickly? As far as stats, I won't have those until next week at her 2 month appointment, but the scale at home says she's almost 12 lbs! Crazy to think she's packed on 5lbs in 2 months!
So yes, she's a good eater. No worries there. For all accounts she's a good sleeper too. We had a few days of a sleep schedule of 9-4:30 and then going down after, not waking up until 7 or 8. We thought we were in heaven! Of course, it didn't last long.
My main mission for this week is to establish some hearty napping. I tend to be a go-go person. I like to do errands, I like to be out and busy. Being housebound is not my forte. However, for the sake of my child and her need for sleep, I have to sacrifice some things. I'm trying to be housebound for most of this week in order to institute some healthy sleep patterns. Thanks to my neighbor Shera, she let me borrow "The Baby Whisperer", which yesterday I quickly leafed through the main points in order to start full fledged this morning.
Having been up since 3:30, I was looking forward to Avery sleeping in bed with me until 10, but I knew I'd regret it later. I got her up at 7 and have been going diligently with a schedule. So far so good. We'll see how she does through the night too.
Some other accomplishments she has done: smiling and cooing. It makes the screaming fits and 2am diaper changes worth while. She's got the cutest smile and saying her "oooo's", and it often shows when you're most frustrated. The other night I was desperate to get her down for bedtime. Usually in our desperation, we just put her bouncer in her pack n play and shake the heck out of it. She's weird, she loves to have her head bobbing in her bouncer...she falls asleep so quickly! So...there I am, an hour and a half into her bedtime routine, hovering over her, shaking the heck out of her bouncer, and she's just sitting there smiling at me. She's too cute to be mad at. I had to bite my lip to keep from smiling back because I didn't want to stimulate her to stay awake.

Family-hood is great. It's fun going out with her and getting smiles from people about "oohh, how cute the baby is", etc. I am now starting the 3rd of my 4 months of maternity leave. I was granted an earlier schedule of 7-3:30 at work, which should help a ton w/ commute and overall happiness at work, but at the same time I'm not looking forward to going back. I will miss seeing her smiling face all day, getting the hugs and coo's from her. There is a small part of me that looks forward to adult interaction :). I'm not counting down the days though.

Things we're looking forward to this month:
- Traveling to Oakhurst for Christina's wedding.
- Her 2 month appointment.
- Day at the Del Mar races.
- Doing a supervisor training in Riverside.
- Flying to Oregon to meet Jason's family.

Don't get too comfortable!

Wow, time flies. It’s been a month already. If I can sum up the past month in one sort of motto, it would be “Don’t get too comfortable”. As many know, babies sole purpose for most of the first few months of life is the following: Eat, Sleep and Poop. So, in order to incorporate my first month motto, I’ll elaborate based on their functions.

Eat: From previous blogs some people can ascertain that I’ve had some issues when it comes to being able to breastfeed. It was something that I wanted to do, and of course everyone says it’s a right that everyone ‘can’ do; but as I’ve come to find out, not everyone can. I found out that I can, but just not enough to keep her happy. We’ve been using formula, which is hell-a expensive! We go through a $25 can a week! It’s interesting figuring out how much to give her because they have no ability to regulate, and then they end up yacking half of it anyway.
During her first week we were working on getting her birth weight back up. When she was born she was 7lbs 8oz. She got down to 6lbs 9 oz! With the formula, by her second week we got her up to 7lbs 14oz! Go us! I have no idea what she is not since that was now 2 weeks ago. However, I had to take a trip to the Labor & Delivery Unit (we left some of my clothes there) and they asked how old she was, at 3 weeks…and commented how she’s a “good eater”. Great…you calling my kid fat? Is she going to have a complex already? Maybe it’s just me having a complex for her. But no, she’s still in newborn clothes but you can see her cheeks filling out a little. I also got a comment, “Is she about 2 months old?”. Um, no…3 weeks.
She’s been fairly yacky too which is a product of a formula fed baby. It’s not too uncommon that one or both of us will go through 2-3 outfit changes a day. And I’ve dealt with the fact that I will perpetually smell like milk for the next few months. I’ve given up changing after every yack episode because like my motto says…Don’t get too comfortable.

Sleep: We have been very blessed in the sleep department. Everything that I heard at first was “Oh, the first month is hell…the first 2-3 months is hell”. I was thinking…a month is a really long time! None the less, the first month has gone by fast, but already by about 2 weeks she was sleeping in a 6 hour stretch! Now lets put this into context. A newborn is supposed to be fed every 3 hours. Some think…3 hours isn’t terrible. It’s not 3 hours from the end of the feeding, but from the beginning. So say you get up at 2am, feeding lasts until 2:45, and it takes about 15 minutes for them to get to sleep...it’s already 3am. Then factor in that it takes people about 15-20 minutes to fall asleep (me=1 hour), then it’s 3:30-4 depending on who you are; get about an hour of sleep before you have to repeat the whole process over again! That, my friends, is where the exhaustion comes from. So, when us parents wake up at 5-6 hour stretches and realize that she’s quiet…it’s terribly easy to pop out of bed with fear that your child has stopped breathing. It’s nice to find out that she hadn’t. More often than not, she goes down around 9pm, wakes up at 2, goes back down between 2:30-3, then gets up at 6, goes back down till 9am. It’s marvelous. However, there are days where she still does the every 3 hour feeding frenzies…to which I say…Don’t get too comfortable.

Poop: Everyone’s favorite topic. I won’t go into too much detail about this one. Plumbing is working fine and we go through a bazillion diapers a day. I do have to say my Diaper Champ is working like a Champ! Jason is on diaper pail emptying duty and he always gags when opening it, and I have to admit that I can’t smell it . We’ve been through 1 month and haven’t had any poo leakage. I’ve been peed on and she’s peed through several diapers. But I do now that the poo leakage is inevitable. So I know not to get too comfortable with her and/or I not needing an outfit change due to poo reasons.

Milestones: Avery is starting to be more alert. She’s a bit fussy during the day and often doesn’t seem content just being awake. She loves the outdoors which is awesome since it’s summer time. She gets calm quickly and momma can work on her tan . This month has been a learning process for all of us. Figuring out her patterns, her cries, what she likes and doesn’t like, etc. She’s a little person with a budding personality. I can’t wait to spend more time with her and learn all about her!

On to month 2! Wish us luck!

Week One: Challenges

Man, what a challenge. A good challenge, but still a challenge. It’s been a week since I officially became a mom. It’s been an awesome and trying experience. And this is all the beginning!! Most of the trying times have been at home trying to find our routine, but it all started with false hopes given in the hospital.

Breastfeeding: We took a class to prepare ourselves. I don’t think the amount of classes can prepare you for the actual process. I took the limited information that I knew and tried as soon as I could in the hospital. During the night when we were woken up for a feeding, one of the nurses commented how Avery was an “advanced feeder” and I had perfect breastfeeding ‘parts’. I was thinking, awesome! This is going to be easy! Ha ha ha. No. My daughter is a screamer! By day 2 we discovered this high pitched scream that only dogs should hear. Luckily God blessed me with a deaf left ear. I stick her on my left shoulder, but seriously, this scream went straight to my tear ducts. It was the scream of “Mom! You’re not feeding me enough!”, “Mom! You’re not doing it right!!!”, “Mom!! Make me feel better”. Of course that just made me bawl. But at that point most anything made me bawl.

So without going into too much graphic detail, we were not a made in heaven match when it came to that department. We had two lactation consultations, one which I fell asleep during (she gave me permission). I felt like we were given enough tips to get us started at home. We discharged on Monday and came home to…life. We couldn’t have Avery go to the nursery to get a few hours of sleep, we had no nurses to scream “HELP!” to, and my nurses wouldn’t be there to dole out my medication.

I don’t even know how much sleep we got the first night. I knew it was to be expected. The problem was I wasn’t producing enough to satisfy her, so she was just MAD all the time. It was so frustrating and exhausting.

We went to the doctor the next day and she was down 12% from her birthweight. The doctor was concerned since the day before she was down 10%, it was a loss of 3 oz. She had us to a pre and post feeding weight in which she gained 1 oz. She advised that we supplement w/ the pump, and then come in the next day for a reweigh. So Jason and I got all situated at home, sterilized all pump materials, got it all set up…nothing. Drops. Again come the tears. I really didn’t want to supplement with formula, but when I saw that and realized that I really wasn’t able to provide for Avery at that time, we conceded to formula. I was so disappointed.

We got the formula and she was knocked out as soon as we gave it to her. I think she needed the rest and the full belly. She got so much more sleep the second night. We were faithful in waking her up every 2-3 hours. We were determined to get her weight up! The next day she gained 3 oz and was back up to the 10% down. We did a pre/post feeding weight again to see if I was producing more. This time she gained nothing! More disappointed. However, I was so excited about getting sleep and not having a screaming child at 3 am that it was ok. We did the same thing and went back the next day for a reweigh and got her up to 7lbs!

Avery’s doctor, who is wonderful and has called me everyday this week to see if we were doing ok, recommended some herbal supplements for me to speed things along. I’ve been doing so and she’s been a lot happier using both me and the bottle.

Overall we’re adjusting. We’re learning her cues, her cries, what calms her down, etc. A work in process.

Announcing Avery Christine Stone

Avery’s Birth Story: please note that this is a birth story. This involves somewhat graphic details of which some people may or may not want to read. You have been warned.

We had our 39 week Dr’s appt on 6/2 in which we decided that she because had made little to no progress in the past week, we were scheduled to induce that Sunday 6/6. Once I posted that online, I got so many comments about how she was going to come in the next 24 hours. I was hoping they were right but wasn’t relying solely on that, as 6/4 was her due date.

The next morning woke up around 5:15, which isn’t that unusual for me. I started having some cramps in the front a few times, just like period cramps. It quickly went to my lower back. I noticed I had to go to the bathroom. I managed to go #2 2x’s in the span of about 10 minutes, which is unusual for me. I crawled back into bed and noticed that my back pain was continuous for a short period of time allowing for a break. In the meantime, I got in my iPhone and made a post to my pregnancy forum girls asking if I was in labor. I also used a contraction app to time my pains. I was having the surging back pains lasting about 1 minute and about 5 minutes apart. I timed these for about an hour until Jason got up and came in at 7ish. I told him what was happening and I wasn’t sure if I was in labor because it was only in my lower back. While he’s in the shower I went to the bathroom again, this time just pee. I headed back to bed. As soon as I laid down I got right back up and ran to the bathroom. My water broke!! Luckily I caught it before I made a mess. I was instantly excited because that meant she was coming!!

Did we rush to the hospital? No, like true Carrie form I got in the shower and then straightened my hair, ate some breakfast, double/triple checked our list of things to bring and our bags, texted the appropriate people, then called the MD and left. We had to go to the hospital pretty immediately because I was strep positive and since my water broke, they had to start me on antibiotics early so we didn’t give a bug to Avery.

We arrived around 10am. I was already having contractions about every 3 minutes, lasting about a minute. They continued and increased in intensity, being pretty regular. Around 2pm I asked for the epidural. I had tried to go natural but I didn’t realize what a woos I was for pain. I was sad because I was only at 3cm when I asked for it. But I’ve heard miracles of “spontaneously dilating to 10cm” when relaxed w/ the epidural. I was hoping I’d be one of those. Nope! They also started me on pitocin about 4 units to speed things along.

At around 8pm or so, I told my MD that I was having these “throbbing vagina pains”. He laughed and said he’d never heard that before. It basically felt as if someone was kicking me in the crotch over and over and over again. My nurse pushed the extra dose button 4 times before she called the anesthesiologist to come back and give me an extra surge in my line. That seemed to help a bit. Also during this I had also developed a fever I wasn’t aware of. Started at 99 something and was at 100.3 when they told me I had one.

Around 11:30pm the pains came back. The anesthesiologist decided to redo the epidural, hoping that being in a new position would help distribute the medication. He redid it and I was back to feeling good and was able to nap for a while. I was still maybe only 5cm at this point. Again, hoping that because of the pains I wasn’t able to dilate and then this would relax me some more. Nope! Pitocin was increased to 6 units.

Going on about 2am, pains come back. This time they are in my lower back and way down low in my abdomen. I almost feel like her head was starting to push out. I was so excited that maybe this was it!! Nope!!, only 5-6cm. Are you kidding me?? And to top that off, she was still at like -1 station!! This kid was NOT moving! The anesthesiologist came back and put another surge directly into my line. It felt good, but it never really removed the pain from the front, just the back pain. And with her starting to be basically where my ovaries were, I HURT!!! BAD. Not only that, but they put me on oxygen to “wake the baby” because she had gotten comfy and my contractions weren’t as steady and regular as they had been. I looked over and my Pitocin was now at 8 units, so double what I started at!

I tried to breathe my way through it until about 4am. I just had had it at that point. I broke down crying, hyperventilating, just dying. I began throwing up because of the pain, and probably partly because I was hyperventilating. My doctor came in to check on me and he said I was at 8 cm, but still at -1 station and that she was not dropping. He didn’t know why but he didn’t want to risk giving me more of an epidural only to risk it wearing off and not being able to do a c-section. We decided that due to the pain level, the fact that she wasn’t going to move and I didn’t want to have to replace yet another epidural, we opted for c-section. It would've been one thing to come out of an epidural and feel the pain of your labor, but I went from feeling nothing to feeling 8 units of pitocin at 8cm dilated contractions. Not a pleasant feeling!!

Now at this point since I had been hyperventilating and not doing well, I was shaking bad and I had spiked a fever to 101.3. I felt the fever at that time and was covered in wet washcloths. The anesthesiologist came back as we all agreed to the c-section and decided to give me like 5 times the dose to make sure that I really wasn’t going to feel anything because he didn’t want to do a spinal on me. Luckily it worked relatively quickly and I was feeling somewhat better, but still shaking like a madwoman.

Jason got all suited up, I said goodbye to my sister as they wheeled me in there. The anesthesiologist, who was just phenomenal, started talking to me about how I handle anesthesia. I told him how last time I had fillings I had to take the day off work because I couldn’t talk for about 12 hours after the procedure. He was dumbfounded that the meds had this effect on me. He asked, “Has anyone told you that you’re strange?” I say, “everyday”. Haha.

During the procedure, still shaking, the anesthesiologist says he couldn’t do anything at that moment to help with the shaking but would give me something to relax with once the baby was out. I mentioned how my mouth was dry and he went and got me mouth swabs. The doctor!! He offered to swab my mouth but put the swabs in my hand instead. He could see I was still in distress in started massaging my temples and jaw. This helped considerably and my shaking started to subside. I heard my OB say “Ooops” after they put the curtain up. I was like…”Um, ‘oops’ isn’t really what you want to hear when you’re about to get your belly sliced open…everything ok??”. Apparently the lights were flickering and someone messed with one which prompted the oops. Again, mr anesthesiologist informed me of this. He also got two warm blankets and put them over my chest and arms to warm me up.

The delivery itself was quick, as most c-sections are. I could feel the pressure of what they were doing. I heard them say the head was out, and Jason started to look her way. I didn’t hear her cry but wasn’t worried because I knew that God and the doctors were in control. I heard them say “It’s a girl!” and they kinda showed me her feet (they thought I could see all of her). Jason then went over to the table and she started to cry. The anesthesiologist continued to inform me of what they were doing as well as the fact that he gave me my dose of relaxing meds. I could kind of feel them take effect and the shaking started to subside. A few minutes later they brought her and put her on my chest. Her swollen face was so cute and immediately I noticed that she has Jason’s lips. When I saw her again, her swelling subsided and her lips are like half the size J.

Her stats: 7lbs, 80oz and 20 inches long. Born June 4, 2010 at 5:14 am.

Name: Avery Christine Stone

I managed to get so relaxed that I honestly don’t remember the rest of it. Jason and my sister said when they came back to the room, I was asleep snoring away. I was glad I got the rest because after that ordeal I needed it.

Often you talk to mothers who go through living hell to deliver their babies and minutes after they say that they’d do it all over again.

In a heartbeat…

39 weeks and 4 days

By all accounts and purposes, I should have a pretty significant title change in the next 3 days. I know that most babies don't come by their due date...but I'm determined to have that title change within the next 3 days! That title change being that of a "mother". Whoo hoo!

I haven't written since I've been on maternity leave which is surprising since I've had some extra freetime. At first I was busy nesting/cleaning. I had guests in town, Jason was out of town, etc. My main goal was not to go into labor while Jason was in Key West. Unfortunately, that time did call for me to do some massive cleaning. Luckily, I did not go into labor. At 36 weeks, I was 50% effaced and was not dilated.

Jason made it home safely after enjoying a wonderful wedding of our friends Jeremy and Jenny. At week 37, I was 75% effaced and 1 cm dilated. My doctor thought from the progress I made in that week that I was considered "due anyday" and to watch for signs and symptoms. The next week I took is fairly easy, while still having the nesting bug. 38 week there was no change. My doctor still said that he didn't think I'd make it to my due date. I think Avery is calling his bluff.

This past week I've been trying to do everything to make some progress. My nesting this past week has been out of control! From cleaning the house windows and screens to rearranging and cleaning my kitchen...my house is pristine! I've never been more happy with how the house looks...and I know it won't last long with a new baby being around...but for now I'm happy with it. I also took to drinking raspberry leaf tea, made some "labor cookies", trying some other suggested methods which I won't discuss on here, and trying to take long walks. I can tell I'm making progress, but not enough to get her out!

I know, I know. I'm impatient. She should be here within the next 3 or so days. Why rush it? I don't know. Can I say I'm sick of being pregnant? Not so much. By all accounts and purposes this has been a really easy pregnancy. Do I want to meet her? Heck yah! Am I looking forward to not getting sleep? Heeeecccck no. It's very odd but in the past few months I've slept better than before I was pregnant. I'm not ready to give that up. Am I impatient? YES! I want to show her off :). And I know this sounds cheesy, but I want to meet the little person that Jason and I created :).

3 days. Prepare for LOTS of pictures. Until then, heres some full term, almost 40 week belly pictures! I didn't even attempt to look "cute" for these. Enjoy!




This was my attempt to get Heidi in the belly shot, but she wasn't being very cooperative.

Miss her!

I was originally going to save a blog for Wordless Wednesday but when I was searching random pictures, nothing quite held the mark like a picture of Helen and I. I decided to bump up the blog to today instead of Wednesday.
Today is the 2nd year anniversary that my stepmother, Helen, died. It's hard to believe that it's been 2 years since we said goodbye. As many of you know, Helen battled breast cancer for about 7 years before it ultimately took her life in 2008. And when I say battled, I mean she was a fierce knight w/ armor and all, ready with her sword! She didn't let it get her down, didn't succumb to the nausea, and only mildly complained about headaches. Heck, I wouldn't have even known she was on chemo unless she told me. I was usually too selfish and scared to ask.

Helen had been my stepmother for the previous 16 years, although it felt like longer. I've known her practically all of my life! I started going to Village Christian in 3rd grade and had difficulty making friends, but was good with the younger kids. I would always ask if I could play with the littler kids, kind of as a "big sister" role. Helen worked on that playground watching the same age group. One day she mentioned how she was going to the football game that Saturday and I said, "Hey, so are my dad and I". I told my dad that he HAD to meet Mrs. McBee (everyone was a Mrs to me back then). He was a gentleman and bought her coffee, only to discover that she didn't drink coffee. Two years later they were married.

Now, I can't say that it was always pleasant. As any sort of blended family who is not the Brady Bunch there were times of yelling, screaming, name calling, grounding...you name it. I know now, as an adult, that none of these were without warrant and without love. It wasn't until I became an adult that I learned to appreciate my parents (as many wise new adults often come to that realization). Helen and I developed a new-found respect for each other. As an adult she could treat me differently, and as an adult I reacted towards her differently. We quickly learned to develop a love for Cosmo's, shopping, fire pits and more shopping. Helen could spend like no other!! A trait my husband does not appreciate that I have.

Honestly when the diagnosis came, I was a sophomore in college. No one in my family had been sick, let alone, died before. This was all new and surreal to me. I didn't want to believe it so I said what everyone else said...we'll fight it! First came lumpectomy, radition, another lumpectomy, mastectomy to one, chemo, mastectomy to the other, chemo, chemo, chemo. This pattern went for 7 years, never in remission. 7 years of fighting.

It wasn't until January of 2008 that we realized that the end was near. I was fortunate enough to have a conversation with her, knowing that we didn't have long together. I thanked her for her profound role in my life, thanked her for beautifully planning my wedding and told her how I would miss her and grieved that my children would never know her. We cried, much like I am doing now in writing this. We knew that God had other plans although I wanted her to stay.

The next 4 months were just about the hardest in my life. New marriage, work, school, licensing exams and dealing with Helen dying. A part of my life I hope never to repeat. We were able to say goodbye in a lucid moment but continued to watch her slip away. I know she wouldn't have wanted it any other way, but all 4 of us kids and my dad were there as she passed.

A new chapter unfolds. I'm due to give birth to a daughter in the next 32 days. My daughter will never meet this amazing woman. That has been the hardest thing to deal with in my pregnancy. She had the opportunity to be a grandmother to 3 grandkids and did a darned good job at it!

I was telling a friend of mine today. Death is weird. This person goes from being such a part of your life, so accessible and so "there" to being a part of your history. That person was so accessible and such a part of me, and now it's something that I have to remember. And for those that meet me in the future and I talk about her or show that I'm influenced in some way, they will never understand because she is a part of my past. Not someone I can introduce them to. But if her influence lives on, then hopefully others can be drawn to her maker.

Helen, you were a great mother, a great step-mother and a terrific grandmother. You will forever be missed!